"Exodus 20:12 “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you."
Of the moral commands that apply to us today, this one certainly does and is often overlooked.
Let us get one thing out of the way that Jesus said before we press on:
"Matthew 10:37 Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me."
Jesus says that we are to love him more than our parents. Jesus DOES NOT mean that you are to hate, disparage or hurt your parents, but what he does expect is for all of his followers to love him more than them, but NOT to the exclusion of them. See here on Matthew 10:34: http://answering-judaism.blogspot.co.uk/2014/05/did-jesus-dishonour-his-parents-and.html
What do I mean by not to the exclusion of them? Simple, Jesus himself said the following to the Pharisees:
"Mark 7:6 He replied, “Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you hypocrites; as it is written:
“‘These people honor me with their lips,
but their hearts are far from me.
7 They worship me in vain;
their teachings are merely human rules.’[b]
8 You have let go of the commands of God and are holding on to human traditions.”
9 And he continued, “You have a fine way of setting aside the commands of God in order to observe[c] your own traditions! 10 For Moses said, ‘Honor your father and mother,’[d] and, ‘Anyone who curses their father or mother is to be put to death.’[e] 11 But you say that if anyone declares that what might have been used to help their father or mother is Corban (that is, devoted to God)— 12 then you no longer let them do anything for their father or mother. 13 Thus you nullify the word of God by your tradition that you have handed down. And you do many things like that.”"
The Pharisee's tradition caused them to serve God at the EXPENSE of their parents, essentially trying to deny that they had responsibility to help their parents when they are old. This is an extreme position to take and Jesus denounced the Pharisees for it.
Jesus doesn't expect you to NEVER care for your parents period, otherwise he wouldn't of condemned the Pharisee's tradition and he would of simply let them be if that was the case.
Mosaic Law called for your death with respect to not honoring your parents.
"Exodus 21:15 “Anyone who attacks[c] their father or mother is to be put to death."
"Leviticus 20:9 “‘Anyone who curses their father or mother is to be put to death. Because they have cursed their father or mother, their blood will be on their own head."
While Christians are not under the Old Testament law and the death penalty is not applicable to the Christian church, it does stress and express how seriously God takes honoring one's parents.
If you think about it, being banned from using your PS3 or XBOX (or whatever game console you use) or being banned from hanging out with your friends via being grounded is a mercy compared to being put to death eh?
Paul himself even stresses the importance of obeying one's parents:
"Ephesians 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— 3 “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”[a]
4 Fathers,[b] do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord."
"Colossians 3:20 Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.
21 Fathers,[c] do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged."
This exhortation is carried through the NT, Just reading Romans 1 we see the following:
"Romans 1:28 Furthermore, just as they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, so God gave them over to a depraved mind, so that they do what ought not to be done. 29 They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, 30 slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; 31 they have no understanding, no fidelity, no love, no mercy. 32 Although they know God’s righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them."
This is indeed quite serious.
Is there a time where disobedience to your parents is allowed, Yes, but only ONE context. If your parents tell you to violate what God has said in his word, Only then can you disobey, but if your parents tell you to do something that is good in God's sight, like help them out, tidy your room or something like that, then carry out what they say. Disobedience to parents is only allowed IF they tell you to disobey God, that's it.
Be bereans and let me know what you think.
PS. Jesus even tells John to look after his mother, which is honouring your parents biblically, but not in the Romanist sense of praying to her or asking her to go to God and other blasphemous doctrines of Rome. See my articles on Mary here: